FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!

I can't believe this motherfucking team. Fuck them in their choking pussy asses. David Wright is a little fucking bitch, who can't stick to the fucking strike zone when the game is on the line. Hey David, here's an idea: PLAY ON THE MOTHERFUCKING LINE every so often, instead of letting double after double roll by you. Ryan Church is a fucking anti-semitic piece of shit, who needs to be sent to the glue factory. Oliver Perez is a fucking infant. Big game pitcher my balls. Way to really earn your future bullshit contract in a walk year you formerly favortie mets pitcher of mine. Brian Schneider is the SECOND WORST HUMAN BEING OF ALL-TIME, slotting in nicely between Hitler and Stalin, and just lapping Genghis Khan. Luis fucking Aguayo is the most fucking horrible base coach in baseball. In fact, he might be the person who is the worst at their job in the history of fucking jobs. Motherfucker sends everybody for months even when they have no shot and then holds guys when it's a pennant race: you fucking bitch. Luis Ayala is a fucking cuntrag. Aaron Heilman (not involved in tonight's abortion) is a taintlicking 'mo of the highest order. I hope he dies in a horrific fire at Notre Dame's football stadium on homecoming weekend. Carlos Delgado---well you, good sir, FUCKED US IN THE ASS for a year and two months, resurgence or not. Carlos Beltran, Jose Reyes---you HAVE BEEN MORE THAN ADEQUATE, so keep that up. Fernando Tatis, way to get hurt you jerk. Billy Wagner, why don't you go blow your effeminate cousin Larry, you incestuous inbred cocksucker. Brian Stokes--you got my hopes up with your strong initial play and then dashed them with your horribleness; you are a microcosm of this team, and for that I hate you. Schoeneweis, you look like a scumbag and you pitch like a douchefag. Feliciano and Smith---your mediocrity is bordering on pathlogical. Dirty Duaner--I feel for you man, but for God sakes just refuse to come in when Jerry asks...you know it's not going to work better than he does.

Jerry Manuel, Jerry Manuel. How do I feel about you? Well, whether it's your doing or not, you have guided the Mets to a much better record than our old friend Willie. However, YOU ARE WILLIE! Ha, you thought I wouldn't catch on but I did JerryWillie! I know it's you hiding behind those glasses and that too-cool-for-school demeanor. I recognize a man who is more content to trot out the same tired relievers in high-leverage situations rather than try someone new because they're too young(*cough* Parnell *cough*). I know a man who sticks with his "proven, veteran guys" even though they have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that they are not major league baseball players any more: FUCK YOU MARLON ANDERSON! I've seen this before JerryWillie, but I'm not getting fooled this time. You've hurt me too much already.